Keeping it Real
I’ve read many non-fiction books over the years. Most were for research or part of my studies, but every once in awhile a non-fiction book grabs my interest and holds on tight. Writing is a difficult task and keeping an audience engaged when writing non-fiction is even harder. I find that I relate better to real life when it’s told as a narrative, but I have also found that the writers’ voice is the most important part of every book.
Non-fiction plays a role in our lives that is almost like a peek behind closed doors. It’s useful to answer the questions we seek clarity to but are too apprehensive to ask. Whether because we’re embarrassed, we feel like others will not understand or we just want to keep it a secret, non-fiction gives us the ability to educate ourselves in private.
The following are books that inspired me, helped me heal or kept me on the right path when I needed a guide. I hope you too, find some wisdom in them.
On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft – Stephen King
I love Stephen King. He’s one of my favorite authors (as he is for many), but I chose this book because it is not typical Stephen King style. Here he talks about himself, what it takes in terms of discipline to be a writer and gives tips and tools of the trade. Being a writer that has published at least 96 books (short stories, non-fiction, novels, interviews and more), I believe he is probably the best person to speak about writing. In this short book, he talks about how he lets the stories write themselves and how personal experiences often shape an author’s view (he himself, was hit by a van in the middle of writing this work and had to postpone it for many years).
Mr. King has quoted many great things but the ones that always stick in my head are:
“If you want to be a writer, you must do two things above all others: read a lot and write a lot.”
Followed by,
“The most important things are the hardest to say because words diminish them”
I’ve found he’s right on both accounts.
How to win friends and influence people – Dale Carnegie
Published in 1936, How to win friends and Influence People has sold over 30 million copies, and for good reason. Mr. Carnegie explains how to form leadership skills, why speaking to people without criticism and condemnation is the key to handling people, how to get others on board with your way of thinking and rules to make your home life happier. My favorite part is that this book can be applied to all areas of life. I filled an entire notebook with scribble while reading and found I needed to read it again to gain access to all the great wisdom inside.
Dale Carnegie wasn’t always a writer. His career started with teaching public speaking, but as he became aware that there wasn’t any information available on the topic he started to write his own to accompany his teachings, and the rest, as they say, is history.
The Five Love Languages – Gary Chapman
The Five Love Language describes how each and every human has a language that shows love and a language in which they receive love. Sometimes those languages are the same and sometimes they are not. Each language looks different and Mr. Chapman gives detailed examples of how to show your partner love with their language. The five love languages are:
-Words of affirmation
-Acts of service
-Gifts
-Quality time
-Physical Touch
I have found that since reading this, I have a better understanding of how to speak to people, why people do some of the things they do and how I like to show and be shown, love. A very insightful read.
His book has expanded to include, the love languages of children, work, apologies and more. If you’re interested in learning more he has a website, a podcast and a quiz you can take to discover your love language and that of your partner(s).
You didn’t think I’d write all of this and not include a book on kink or BDSM did you? You are in luck!
Diary of a Submissive – Sophie Morgan
This book is actually the first of a two-book set about Sophie, an independent modern aged woman who at the beginning doesn’t know what Dominance and Submission is. This memoir follows Sophie and her partner as she discovers the rush of submission, the awakening of her sexuality and dark desires that become reality. Written by a Journalist, Diary of a Submissive in engaging, fantastical and enlightening.
I found this book by happen-chance and am extremely glad I did. I recommend it to anyone interested in D/s and wanting an inside look as to how a dynamic can work, or maybe why it does. It really helped me understand that not every dynamic will be the same and what works for you may not work for me.
There are many other non-fiction books that I wanted to include, but that would take forever, so for now, have a go at these.
Each of us is a book waiting to be written, and that book, if written, results in a person explained.
To see who else is talking about non-fiction for #BookMatters on ifsexmatters.co.uk , click on the badge.
I discovered Sophie’s book in 2014 on the communal bookshelf at our holiday apartment!!! (standing here at that bookshelf with it in my hand https://modestyablaze.com/2014/08/30/book-review-my-not-so-shameful-sex-secrets-by-girl-on-the-net/ ) and then her “No So Ordinary” follow-up. Both interesting and exciting in their own way! Xxx – K
I have to agree. I think I’ll add Not so shameful sex secrets to my reading list 🙂
Thanks.
I’ve read the love languages book—a few years ago, but it was intriguing. My Queen read it at the same time and our languages don’t quite align. But close enough… lol
That last book: Diary of a Submissive, would it apply to male submissives as well as females? Thank you.
Hi! Diary of a Submissive is written as a narrative from a woman’s perspective. The term “submissive” is never actually used from what I can remember. It’s more a story of how a submissive came to be and less of a how-to. But I think it’s a great story, very insightful and full of creative ideas. Hope that helps 🙂
These look great – I always wonder whether BDSM books are fictionalised truths. I shall definitely look into buying the Stephen King book – as you say, what better expert? I also find myself intrigued by the love languages book – when we can get to libraries again I’ll borrow that.
Thank you so much for joining in with my BookMatters meme. I love your choices and they have made me add another couple to my own. I have heard a lot about the Love Languages so feel it is certainly time to read that one and the book from Stephen King on writing – I will look that one up too
May x
You will not be disappointed 🙂