Kinky Advent 2020 – Day 15
See other posts in this project here.
Day 15 is here. Today brought a naughty surprise and a list, reclaiming our needs. While one was for fun, the other decides where the fun begins or if it is at all.
Naughty and Knickerless
Day 15 from The SafeworD/s Club brought us a day with no knickers with the prompt Naughty and Knickerless. The goal was to not wear pantie’s (or briefs or boxers, you get the point) for an entire day. Being pantyless is not something I’m ever thrilled about, unless it’s a direct order that is. I have an unhealthy relationship with my vulva and don’t enjoy it’s appearance much at all. For that purpose I choose to keep it covered.
For the sake of the prompt I gave it a chance though, but after 10 minutes of no knickers in a pair of pants, I thought it had gone on long enough. Not one to quit, I traded the slacks for a skirt, and enjoyed the sensation a whole lot more. It was uncomfortable at first because I’m not used to it. Or at least in my everyday life. Usually when I am commando, Mister has something planned. Something like this:
It was fun and a bit arousing to have a little secret today though, and Mister K was pleasantly surprised too. Over all I think it was a win all around.
Our Needs Reclaimed
At the Submissive Guide, Day 15 brought reflection on our submissive needs. While squirming to find a comfortable spot in a slightly uncomfortable situation, I still found the time to make a list. I find it easier to define my needs in a D/s setting than in my vanilla life. I believe it comes from endless conversation and discussions about our dynamic. Rarely in other parts of your life do you get asked if everything is working well for you. Maybe that’s something we should all work on.
My top 10 needs as a submissive are:
1.
I need to feel like I am a valued possession, I need to feel owned and therefore wanted because of my value.
2.
I need to know that my input will be heard and considered even if it is not used.
3.
Once I’m punished, I need to know that I am forgiven.
4.
I need Mister K to guide me and correct me if I’m wrong in a way that doesn’t make me feel inferior.
5.
I need to know that my safety and stability is taken into account, not only in scene but at all times
6.
I need Mister K to follow through on what he says so that I know he is serious, but also so that I know what he says to me is important to him.
7.
I need to be rewarded for good performance, whether verbally, with a gift or with a reciprocated action.
8.
I need words of endearment or use of my submissive title daily. This helps keep me in my submissive headspace.
9.
I need communication in all things, even if that means being told a longer period of time is needed until we discuss something.
10.
Time, every once in a while to realign and readjust.
Just like boundaries, needs are sometimes necessary to be re-defined as well.
Day 16 brings some Christmas cheer and a little bit of prayer.
Until then, stay naughty!
For more Naughty knickerless posts or to see who else is defining needs, click on the badges.
On another note, I really appreciated this post. Not something I’ve ever put into words, but perhaps I need to do something like this. Great post!!
This is such a lovely article. While I don’t have quite the same list, your list resonates with me with things I think I’m wanting/needing.
I don’t think you’re alone with your relationship with your vulva. I hear and read about this a lot, and I hate how we critique ourselves. We truly are our own worst enemies. When I first dipped my toe into being a nudist I was so scared and critical of everything. I would see and read about people with varying bodies feel so confident and happy. All I could see was imperfections and shame. A silver lining to the COVID lock down has been my ability to free myself (mostly) of these negative thoughts. Now I spend multiple days in a row naked at home. I’ll even venture on the back deck when it’s pretty and no one is around to see me. I have been doing it so much and for so long now that I am bothered when i have to get dressed or the doorbell rings. I would encourage you to explore more of your naked self, and maybe request the Mr help you out a bit. Sometimes we just need a bit of encouragement to make that leap. You are a beautiful woman, embrace that womanhood. Even the parts you don’ t like. Spend a day naked and let me know what you think. 🙂
Oh, you’re words are so inspiring. Mister K loves my vulva, its only me who has a distaste for it. I’m told it’s the most common type, but of course before interacting in the adult content world , I only ever saw the neat and tidy ones. Now I know they come is all shapes and sizes, I just need to accept mine.
I love your advice here and will endeavor to try. I’ll let you know how it goes 😉
It remarkable how accepting your body the way it was created helps you’re overall mental health. You should take my advice even if it’s a day by yourself with no one home. I love to cook naked, so maybe that is stem thing you can do too. I’m sure the Mister won’t mind. Invite him to join you, if permissible.
My Queen is unhappy with her vulva too! Honestly I find it beautiful. I love how her lips project. I think hers is perfect. But she has threatened surgery so hers becomes “neat and tidy!” I hope she never does it.
I’ve thought about it too, but Mister K always talks me out of it. I blame porn and modern advertising for making us believe everything should be neat and tidy. Hopefully future generations will learn from body image issues so many have today.
But there are women in porn with vulvas that aren’t “neat and tidy!” I admit they are a rarity, but they are still amongst my faves! I remember Marilyn Chambers had great lips. And she was mostly shaved too. She was one of my all time faves because of those two qualities. I’m glad Mr K has talked you out of it. You’re beautiful as you are!
Your ten things echoed with me. Many of them will be on my list too 🙂
Sexy images!
~ Marie